| I know that it sounds crazy to list marriage counseling | | | | they reveal what they know and don't know. When a |
| as a cause of divorce and even crazier to call it one | | | | medical doctor isn't sure about what is wrong they tell |
| of the greatest causes of divorce, but it's true. | | | | you. Some of them refer you to an expert when it is |
| When people think of old-time farmers they usually | | | | necessary and others experiment a little bit if your |
| think of a man of self sufficiency. If a farmer has a | | | | malady isn't too serious; you'll be informed; but they |
| problem with one of his cattle, for instance, and there | | | | never give up. |
| isn't a veterinarian for miles around, he's either going to | | | | Clinical psychologists are not healers; they are |
| figure out what needs to be done or lose his cow. | | | | essentially students who rarely have the same mental |
| Necessity is the mother of invention. | | | | capability as doctors. To make matters worse, clinical |
| But what would happen if the farmer called a | | | | psychologists pretend to be experts in relationships |
| veterinarian who really didn't know anything about | | | | even though the vast majority of couples who go to |
| cows but claimed to be an expert? Of course the | | | | marriage counseling end up divorced soon thereafter. |
| veterinarian would do his best to save the cow but his | | | | To make matters even worse, marriage counselors |
| motivation wouldn't be the same as the farmer's, who | | | | typically have names and phone numbers of lawyers |
| depends on the cow for he and his family's livelihood. In | | | | and mediators; they routinely give up. They give up |
| that case the farmer is better off doing all he can | | | | because they don't know how to help you and so |
| without the interference that would come from a | | | | they convince you your marriage cannot survive. |
| phony, even if the phony had authentic credentials. | | | | A Great Cause of Divorce is Having a So-Called |
| Now some people would think that even if the | | | | Expert Tell You There is No Hope |
| veterinarian was a phony at least he is a phony with | | | | I cannot tell you how many of my clients came to me |
| experience. Although that may be true the real proof | | | | because they were not ready to believe their marriage |
| lies in whether the cow ends up living or dies, the result | | | | could fail - and it didn't. But can you imagine how |
| will testify to his experience. | | | | discouraged you would be if a cancer specialist told |
| Clinical psychologists and marriage counselors earn | | | | you that you were for sure going to die? Similarly |
| doctorate degrees and then call themselves doctors, | | | | when people go to incompetent marriage counselors |
| which is somewhat misleading to people who place | | | | and are told their marriage is going to die they naturally |
| them at the same level as medical doctors; they are | | | | believe it, thus living out the prediction of a phony with |
| not! In the case of marriage counseling, statistics tell us | | | | credentials. |
| marriage counselors are, for the most part, unable to | | | | When is a Marriage Truly Doomed? |
| heal sick marriages. The title of "doctor" is not the | | | | From my experience a marriage is never truly |
| same as a doctor of medicine. A medical doctor takes | | | | doomed. Yes, there are certainly a few situations that |
| an oath that obligates him to do everything he can to | | | | make a seriously happy marriage more difficult to |
| heal his patient. Medical doctors study long and hard | | | | achieve than most, but 98% of all troubled marriages |
| the science of healing, a science that has been | | | | can turn into spectacularly good marriages; yours can |
| growing since the early part of the 20th century. | | | | too! Don't give up! |
| In general, doctors don't play games with their patients; | | | | |