| Is it a struggle and a challenge getting
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| | its best. The child who knows that he or
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| your kids to complete their daily
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| | she is grounded to their bedroom until
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| homework? Do you get frustrated and
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| | submitting to a specific behavior will
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| dread homework time? If you answered yes
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| | likely make it their duty to convince
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| to either of these questions, this
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| | their parent that they really enjoy the
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| article is for you. This article
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| | consequence. By getting parents to
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| contains insightful solutions to your
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| | believe this may subsequently entice the
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| daily homework blues. Having worked as a
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| | parent to choose a different consequence
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| mental health therapist for over 20
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| | or eliminate the consequence altogether.
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| years, I noticed that many families share
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| | In reality, your child would rather play
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| specific common unhealthy beliefs and
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| | outside or in public areas of your home
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| values centered on the issue of homework.
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| | instead spending days and nights in his
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| This article identifies these unhealthy
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| | or her bedroom.
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| beliefs and values that impede the
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| | If your child engages in activities in
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| homework process.
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| | his or her bedroom such as watching
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| 1st Unhealthy Belief: "I need to assist
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| | television or playing video games instead
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| my child with homework because he or she
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| | of completing homework, you should remove
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| doe not understand the homework."
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| | these activities from your child's
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| Many parents feel that their children
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| | bedroom because he or her is compromising
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| require assistance when completing
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| | your parental authority. These items can
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| homework. School teachers give children
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| | be restored once your child follows your
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| homework to practice specific skills
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| | rules.
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| taught that day in school. Your child,
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| | 5th Unhealthy Belief: "I believe that
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| unless he or she was inattentive in
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| | my child should serve a mandatory daily
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| class, should have a general idea of how
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| | study hour regardless of his or her
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| to complete his or her homework.
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| | academic ability."
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| Sometimes, kids pretend that they do not
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| | Typically, a mandatory daily study hour
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| know how to complete homework in hopes
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| | consists of children completing homework
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| that their parent would do it for them.
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| | and engaging in other academic activities
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| A parent who routinely helps their child
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| | such as reading to complete the hour. I
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| complete homework because of class
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| | would only recommend a child serve a
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| inattentiveness is reinforcing the
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| | daily study hour if his or her report
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| inattentiveness. Why would your child
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| | card grades fall below a specific grade
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| choose to pay attention in class if he or
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| | expectation. For instance, if you and
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| she knows that you are going to help them
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| | your child previously agreed that a daily
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| with their homework anyway?
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| | study hour would be enforced if his or
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| Failing to pay attention in class is not
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| | her grades fall below a C in any given
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| an academic issue. It is a behavioral
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| | subject, your child should be required to
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| issue that requires a behavioral
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| | serve a daily study hour for the next
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| intervention. Your child needs to take
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| | school term until his or her grades
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| responsibility for failing to pay
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| | improve to a C or better.
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| attention in class. One way to do this
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| | If your child maintains grades
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| is to have your child attend school the
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| | consistent with your expectations as
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| next day with his or her homework
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| | noted on his or her report card, he or
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| uncompleted. It is not your fault that
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| | she should only complete their daily
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| your child failed to complete his or her
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| | homework and should not be required to
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| homework. I have worked with several
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| | serve a daily study hour. Play time is
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| parents who blamed themselves for and
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| | very important to a child. Therefore, it
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| assumed responsibility of their child's
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| | is necessary for children to have equal
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| homework that they began experiencing
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| | play and study time. A child should only
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| signs of burnout. Give that
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| | have a mandatory study hour as a
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| responsibility over to your child. Your
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| | consequence to poor school grades as
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| child will ultimately experience school
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| | noted on his or her report card.
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| consequences for his or her failure to
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| | 6th Unhealthy Belief: "I believe that
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| complete homework. By giving your child
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| | my child should begin completing homework
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| the ownership and responsibility of his
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| | after dinner each day."
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| or her homework promotes accountability,
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| | The best time for children to complete
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| organization, and self-confidence.
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| | homework is right after they get home
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| Parents should never fear having their
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| | from school. Once at home, children
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| children experience negative
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| | should have a snack consisting of an
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| consequences. Consequences are learning
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| | edible and a beverage before completing
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| experiences that teach children right
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| | homework. The snack time should be
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| from wrong. If parents always protect
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| | limited from 15 minutes to a half an
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| their children from experiencing
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| | hour. It is important for children to
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| consequences, their children may never
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| | have a snack, especially a beverage,
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| learn right from wrong. Instead, they
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| | before completing their homework because
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| will always expect their parents to pick
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| | this helps re-energize their brain
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| up the pieces when they make a mistake.
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| | muscles. Since there is some daylight
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| Think of it this way - when you do not
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| | after school, this presents as an
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| know how to complete a specific task at
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| | incentive for children. The quicker your
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| your place of employment, what do you do?
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| | child successfully completes his or her
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| Do you ask your significant other or
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| | homework, the quicker he or she can
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| your employer how to complete the task?
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| | engage in outside privileges. In
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| Obviously, you would get your instruction
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| | addition, there would be plenty of time
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| from your employer. Therefore, your
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| | for children to complete their homework
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| child needs to learn from his or her
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| | before bedtime. Children who complete
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| school teacher. I am not suggesting that
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| | homework after dinner have less time to
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| you shouldn't help your child every once
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| | complete homework.
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| in awhile. However, if assisting your
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| | It is very important for you to tell
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| child with homework becomes routine,
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| | your child when he or she needs to begin
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| there is a problem.
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| | completing homework rather than telling
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| An easy indicator as to whether your
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| | him or her the time that homework should
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| child truly requires assistance with
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| | be completed. For instance, if you tell
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| homework is to ask his or her school
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| | your child that homework must be
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| teacher how much assistance your child
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| | completed by 6:00pm, your child might
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| requires with school work. If your
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| | feel like a failure if his or her
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| child's school teacher says that your
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| | homework extends beyond the designated
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| child works independently and requires
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| | time. In addition, your child might rush
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| minimal assistance, then there is a
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| | to complete his or her homework making
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| strong possibility that your child is
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| | many homework errors.
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| manipulating by making you believe that
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| | Children typically find it very
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| he or she requires significant
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| | difficult completing homework after
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| assistance.
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| | dinner primarily because of fatigue.
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| If your child's school teacher reports
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| | Fatigue usually follows a heavy meal.
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| that your child frequently day dreams,
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| | Parents often extend their children's
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| fails to pay attention, and requires
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| | daily bedtime in order for them to
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| significant assistance when completing
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| | complete their homework. Parents should
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| school work, you should probably consult
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| | never extend their children's bedtime
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| with your child's physician to rule out
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| | because children need their sleep and
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| medical and/or psychological factors that
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| | rest in order to grow and to function
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| might be contributing to these behaviors.
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| | properly the next day.
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| | 7th Unhealthy Belief: "My child refuses
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| 2nd Unhealthy Belief: "My child will
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| | or forgets to bring homework home and
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| only complete his or her homework in my
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| | there is nothing that I can do to change
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| presence."
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| | his or her behavior."
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| This is a common misconception that
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| | First of all, you need to develop a rule
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| parents share. The problem with having
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| | at home that states that homework must be
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| your child complete homework in your
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| | brought home and completed daily. In
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| presence is that there are usually too
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| | addition, this rule must have its own
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| many distractions or stimulation making
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| | unique consequence in the event that your
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| it difficult for him or her to focus and
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| | child fails to bring homework home.
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| concentrate on homework. Asking for your
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| | Which ever consequence you choose to
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| assist is also too convenient. Dinner
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| | enforce, it is important that its
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| preparation, people walking through the
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| | duration lasts for one day, from the time
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| room, conversations, and telephone calls
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| | your child arrives home from school till
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| are all common distractions to a child
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| | the time he or she goes to bed. It is
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| who is attempting to complete homework.
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| | equally important that the duration of
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| This is especially counterproductive for
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| | the consequence last no more than one day
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| a child who has been diagnosed with ADHD
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| | per occurrence. If you consequent your
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| (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity
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| | child for more than one day per
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| Disorder).
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| | occurrence, your child will develop
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| The best place for a child to complete
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| | learned helplessness and will not be
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| homework is in his or her bedroom or some
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| | motivated to bring home or complete
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| other secluded room of the home.
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| | homework for the duration of the
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| Completing homework in a secluded room
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| | consequence making the consequence
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| would limit distractions/stimulation and
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| | ineffective.
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| make it less convenient to ask you for
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| | In order for you to learn whether or not
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| assistance.
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| | your child has homework each day, you
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| 3rd Unhealthy Belief: "Toys and games
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| | should require him or her to bring a note
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| in my child's bedroom prevent him or her
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| | pad to and from school detailing daily
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| from completing homework."
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| | homework assignments. Each day, your
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| Think in terms of your child completing
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| | child should be responsible for logging
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| homework in his or her bedroom as a form
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| | homework assignments as well as having
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| of grounding. Your child is not really
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| | the school teacher verify and sign the
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| grounded. However, your child should not
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| | note pad. You should discuss the
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| be allowed to exit his or her bedroom,
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| | logistics of this technique with your
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| for the exception of bathroom breaks,
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| | child's school teacher prior to its
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| until the homework is completed and
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| | implementation.
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| checked by you. Since your child will
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| | If your child claims that he or she
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| receive limited attention from you,
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| | forgets to bring home homework and/or the
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| completing homework in the bedroom will
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| | note pad, your child needs to be
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| only act as an incentive for your child
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| | consequented at home. Consequenting your
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| to complete homework timely. This
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| | child will encourage him or her to
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| technique will also help your child learn
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| | remember to bring homework and/or the
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| to focus, become more organized and
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| | note pad home the next time. Please keep
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| structured, and become accountable for
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| | in mind that consequences always follow
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| his or her actions.
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| | forgetfulness. Therefore, we should
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| If by chance your child fails to
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| | never fail to give children consequences
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| complete his or her homework by their
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| | when they forget specific tasks. If
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| bedtime, your child should attend school
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| | forgetfulness is a routine problem for
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| the following day with his or her
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| | your child that extends beyond homework,
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| homework uncompleted. As mentioned
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| | you should consider having him or her
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| earlier, your child will experience
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| | evaluated by a physician to rule out
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| consequences at school for his or her
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| | medical or psychological issues that
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| failure to complete homework.
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| | might be contributing to forgetfulness.
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| 4th Unhealthy Belief: "My child loves
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| | Sometimes, depression and stress
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| being in his or her bedroom and will
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| | contribute to forgetfulness. However, if
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| never submit to completing homework in
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| | your child routinely remembers other
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| there."
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| | things except for his or her homework,
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| Even though plenty of parents tried to
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| | your child might be attempting to
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| convince me that their children would
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| | manipulate you.
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| rather spend days and nights in their
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| | It is my hope that the tips and
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| bedroom rather than playing outside or in
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| | techniques discussed in this article
|
| the living room, this is manipulation at
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| | reduce the homework blues at your home.
|